10 Things I hated about Scooby-Doo

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 (No particular order of Importance except for maybe No.1)

 

1. You could never solve the mystery youself; no-matter how many clues they gave you before hand. The true identity and motive of the monster or ghost; was always some crotchety old bastard exploiting a local legend to cover up his crime.

 

2. When everybody split up into 2 groups, why was it alway Velma, Shaggy and Scooby, as one group, and Fred with Daphne in the other, why didn't they ever show what Fred and Daphne were doing?

 


 

 3. The monsters were too fucking scary for its intended audience (8-year olds).

 

4. What the fuck is a "Scooby Snack???" And if there so good, why didn't Hanna Barbara ever make a breakfast cereral called "Scooby-Snacks?"

 

5. They wore the same fucking clothes. I know its a cartoon, and this is common just like with every other cartoon... infact now that I think about it, so did the Dukes of Hazzard!!! They had more costume changes on Gilligans Island -and they were ship-wrecked.

 

6. Talking dog aside none of the other 4 characters had anything in common. I mean best case senerio, Fred and Daphne would be boyfriend and girlfriend, and Fred would have bought his weed from Shaggy in High-School. Velma is some nerd that Daphne and the other cheer-leaders would have made fun of. 


 7. Why was Fred always driving??? I never saw an Alpha-Male with a neckerchief. Also he may have been a closet homo-sexual.

 

8. Scooby walked like a dog, but he was never actually seen acting like a dog. i.e Humping anyone's leg. Taking a shit in the van. Scratching or licking himself, and no one is ever amazed or freaked out about a talking dog who can not only understand but communicate by talking with humans as well.

 

 

9. The dog had more sense than the Hippie. When a mission was too dangerous, the dog refused 3 Scooby-Snacks, while the Hippie always broke down and got down on all four, and started sniffing the ground for clues.

 

10. You see constant reruns of every episode EXCEPT the first pilot episode which everybody somehow "missed," but if you did happen to catch it, never explained the premise to begin with.  

 

 

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